A Woman’s Theory On Why Women Let Men Cheat

Given that I’m home each day with the kids, we’ve developed sort of a routine when it comes to our television viewing. First comes The Cosby Show – two episodes, then we watch The Price Is Right. Then – I’m ashamed to say this – we watch Maury Povich.

If you’re not familiar with this quality television program, it’s a day time TV talk show. I use the word “talk” very loosely. Most of the show consists of women screaming about how they know that their boyfriend or husband has cheated, or that their man should claim their child and be a better “baby daddy”. Half of the time the man under attack isn’t actually the baby’s father and the woman runs off of the stage in shame. (I’m not exactly sure why the woman is surprised though. Didn’t you know that you slept with more than one man? I’m going to need for you to have a little better control over your lady station.)

What really kills me are the women who bring their significant other to the show to give him a lie detector test. I can’t figure out why these women are surprised at the test results when they start off their interview with Maury by saying that they found underwear that didn’t belong to them in the house and unidentified lipstick on his winky. Are these women insane?

My Daddy used to have this saying, “De-nial ain’t just a river in Egypt”. Not exactly sure what in the hell that means but I think that it’s apropos in this situation. Why are you ignoring the obvious signs of infidelity? If your gut is telling you he’s cheating (along with all of his family members).. Well um… he’s probably cheating.

I did a post on Wednesday highlighting some celebrity couples whose relationships have withstood the test of time. The trend that appeared in that list (which a few of my friends politely pointed out – not sure why those jokers don’t like leaving comments) was that quite a few of those couples consisted of men who at one point or another cheated during the course of the relationship. This poses a very interesting question… Why do women let men cheat? I damn sure don’t ever intend to. If I found out that my man ever cheated… Well, hell hath no fury.

I came across an article on BrownSista.com titled The Six REAL Reasons Men Cheat…And Why Women Let Us. In it, this crazy negro writes that in a nutshell men aren’t wired to be faithful and women choose to keep unfaithful men around because that’s all we can get.

*straight-face, crickets chirping

Everyone’s entitled to their own personal opinions and assessments. Here’s mine:
Women – like the one’s on Maury – let men cheat because they’re too insecure to leave them and find someone else who won’t.

Like cold water to the face huh?

These women remain in these relationships because they feel trapped by insecurities and obligations. Will I be able to find someone else? What about the kids? What about our finances? We’ve been together too long. Women are emotionally driven, and because of this, we tend to do crazy things… like stay with a man who’s no good for us.

Ultimately, it always appears easier to stay. Staying then becomes that “enabler” for a man to potentially cheat again. It is what it is. In the past, I’ve even been guilty of this behavior to some degree.

In the long run – as women – we’re setting some really funky examples for our children by doing this. Where it all ends and how to stop the cycle – I’m not sure. I’m not a professional. I’m just a woman with some good a*s opinions. I give many props to all of the Elins, Marias, and Halles out there for having the balls to leave. To all of the Tigers, Arnolds, and Erics – shame on you… but let me not turn this into a man-bashing post. I simply wanted to state some facts.

So if you’re a woman who’s reading this and have ever considered going on Maury to get your man to take a lie detector test to see if he’s cheating – I already have your answer… He is. Don’t let me see you on Maury. My twins and I will always be watching.



  1. Melody Franklin
    January 30, 2012 at 12:19 pm — Reply

    This article is SOOOO on point!! And you've also made me realize something else…apparently I'm a housewife on the low cuz you and the twins TV schedule is EXACTLY mine before I go to work in the afternoons! Smh…lol

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